...frustrated...

Sept. 18, 2025

I am living in a body that is both keeping me alive and making it hard to live. Every day is a negotiation between medications that protect my heart and kidneys but rob me of strength, balance, and mental clarity. I am trying to follow the rules—take the meds, check the numbers, stay hydrated—but the side effects are disabling. I’m not afraid of dying, but I am afraid of falling, of failing those who depend on me, and of losing what’s left of the life I love.